Counseling Couples: The Complexity of Delicate Situations Essay

AbstractLove is patient and manage is kind, fit to Corinthians 134 yet more than(prenominal) and more patronagely matess take on themselves at impasses not knowing which is better to stay unneurotic or to screen. Living in a society of our way expert away, right away empennage present conflicts among couplings in particular when they distributively view as distinguishable views on what is best for their descent. To add more complexity, family units may be non-traditional or opposite elements such(prenominal) as substance abuse and infidelity ar present, which results in the presence of supernumerary stressors. Through c argonful intercession, respect for the family unit, and turn up methodologies, couples counselor-at-law is an avenue that provides hope for preparation for those entering marriage or long-term human relationships, while also providing redemption and take for those who desire to find current relationships.Introduction and HistoryFor m every last(predicate) historic period psychologist work examine and expounded on the enquiry of pioneers such as John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth who create attachment theory, as rise up as, research conducted by Abraham Maslow, who determined that humanness make believe a need for belonging. These pioneers set the foundation for find outing our human-centered desire to have a companion. Prior to these psychologist, the Bible reveals in coevals 2 that Adam was lonely and for that reason, a garter mate was created. Furthermore, agree to Sandberg, Busby, Johnson, & Yoshida (2012), research has shown that even in adulthood, the presence of a signifi plentyt other or attendant can produce feelings of security, relief, and other positive affects whereas the absence seizure of thissecure attachment produces avoidant and anxious behaviors. As individuals engage in relationships, spanning from elementary acquaintances to commits such as marriage, in that location argon times when co mmunication, confidence, and commitment manufacture difficult.Some situations lead couples to seek the intervention and expertise of counselors to assist in reconciling. Despite the troubles that couples encounter, Worthington, Lerner, and Sharp (2005) suggest that by utilizing focusing with the purpose of evolution strong emotional bonds, couples have the ability to sustain long, healthy marriages. As unique as each individual is, so is each family unit or couple and it is alpha that therapist work within the systems that argon presented, because on some occasions, the couple or family simply interacting within itself produces concentrate on and recoveribility of change (Chambless, Miklowitz, and Shoham, 2012). focussing that promotes hope, forgiveness, better communication, conflict resolution, and build commitments, especi whollyy those encompassing Christ, leads to repair and reconciliation, which why most couples initially seek counselling (Worthington, Lerner, & Sharp, 2005).Major Topics in partner offs instructionTypes of Relationships/ CouplesAs times have changed, so have couples. The family unit is very much not the traditional mother, father, and 2.5 children, instead families are now composed of stepparents, stepchildren, and similar-sex relationships. As Christian counselors, relationships may present that are not condoned, yet respected. Stark, Kirk, and Bruch (2012) offer that even though marriage his belatedly become a super high-flownized commitment, the rates for cohabitation and the number of individual(a) parents continues to change magnitude and become more acceptable. pairing has become a wilful institution (Stark, Kirk, & Bruch, 2012). In addition, the composition of marriages has changed as report by the Williams Institute. In 2006, the institute studied same-sex couples describe status and determined that nationally, the number of same-sex couples who reported their status to the government increase 437 percent (Swa nson, 2007).Along with the increase of reporting same-sex couples, the number of blended families has increased as well. Gonzalez (2009) discusses that the couples that blend families often baptismal font more challenges, they are more overwhelmed, and they often feel increased air pressure to resolve issues quickly. Couples that form blended families are challenged with making the relationship with their partner work, while also with helping to shape and mold two separate entities into one family unit (Gonzalez, 2009). Blended families are also a more and more significant family arrangement that produces complex relationships and distinctive pressures for each of the family members (Shalay & Brownlee, 2007). Accordingly, there is an increase likelihood that family counselor will encounter blended families more frequent who are seek therapeutic assistance (Shalay & Brownlee, 2007).Cultural SensitivityCounseling couples requires awareness of various cultural belief systems that are important to twain individuals, both individually and together. The perceptions of each individual determines their expectations of the relationship, therefore counselors have to be aware of cultures, beliefs, traditions, and even historical references to ensure that elements are being evaluated from the clients perspective. Couples counseling incorporates cultural intervention that is consistent with the clients belief system regarding healing and has the potential drop to center a stipulate change (Sperry, 2010). Couples counselors should carefully focusing the treatment process based on the core cultural values of both of the individuals that comprise the couple (Sperry, 2010). Sperry (2010) states that there are three specific steps to cultural sensitivity be intimate the cultural identity, identify the family dynamics, and develop a cultural formation that frames the consideration of the issue.ParenthoodOne of the most challenging transitions that couples face is the tra nsition to blood line (PINQUART AND TEUBERT, 2010). During the expectation of a child, parents often become stressed with the required adjustments and often positive communication among couples decrease (Doss, Rhoades, Stanley, & Markman, 2009). For example, as reported by Pinquart and Teubert (2010, in a study conducted by Miller, Pallant & Negri (2006), 80% of first time mothers evince mild symptoms of depression within the first weeks postpartum, while 10 to 30% of mothers developed clearly diagnosed clinical depression. Emotional and psychological distress of this magnitude may also have asignificantly negative effect on parenting behavior, such as sensitivity, investment in the child, overall parenting, and cooperation mingled with parents (Foster, Garber, & Durlak, 2008). Couples experiencing such life changes often seek counseling to better understand each other, the stressors, and methods for making the transition less problematic. Pinquart and Teubert (2010) showed that intervention that were solely couple focused, developed stronger efficacy on couple communication than pure prenatal or postnatal interventions, reminded the couple that they are the foundation of the relationship and conduits of change. experienceMost couples experience problems that are not understood, therefore couples therapist are often presented complaints that are the results of communication failures and conflicts that are directly related to the couples unfulfilled attachment ask (Solomon, 2009). Couples therapy attends to increase the awareness and recognition between partners of their needfully and the relational paths that each partner has encountered (Solomon, 2009). In addition, couples therapy, from an attachment theory approach, attempts to help individual to move beyond what could become an endless cycle of disconcert and blame, and instead teach and shows them they can choose to stop acting defensively with each other (Solomon, 2009). When couples are experien cing issues, intimacy is most often affected, yet with couples therapy, partners are helped to understand their dependence on one another(prenominal) in order to meet their needs for secure attachment through therapeutic process and are encouraged to express emotions when attachment needs are discontented (Solomon, 2009). Solomon (2009) gain ground concludes that if the couple responds by utilizing and giving examples of the ways their past has played out in their current relationship, it becomes feasible to quicken the healing process.Techniques and InterventionsIn the past decade, Christian couple therapy has increased and began to develop although slowly (Hook, Ripley, Worthington, & Davis, 2011). Each couple, each situation, and each counselor is unique, so competency of multiple interventions is required to accommodate the needs and goals determined by the couple. Of these techniques, the hope-focused approach (HFA) to couples counseling is encouraged among Christian couns elors(Worthington, Ripley, Hook, & Miller, 2007). The HFA is based on the supposal that hope is a core Christian value and since Christ ordained marriage, hope is essential among couples (Worthington et al., 2007). The HFA provides couples with strategies for promoting change, crack mutual submission in love, restoration of faith in beau ideal and each other (Worthington, et al., 2007).An alternating(a) counseling technique that is being successful utilized in couples counseling is Marriage Matters (Hook, Worthington, Hook, Miller, & Davis, 2011). Marriage Matters consists of a gild week or 18 mo workshop that is conducted three times per year according to Hook et al (2011). This program is designed to assist couples who desire to invest in their relationship as well as for couples who are experiencing marital difficulties. During each of the nine week workshops, couples correspond from trained professed(prenominal)s about topics that are important for couples such as histor ical background, culture, becoming more empathic during dialogue, conflict resolution, intimacy, forgiveness, and many other topics (Hook, et al., 2011).Ethics Involved in Counseling CouplesA conservatively compiled confidentiality agreement is essential when therapists agree to treat clients conjointly with their spouse or significant other (Bass & Quimby, 2006). Currently although there are not any ethical codes that directly indicate that conjoint counseling is considered unethical, increase metrical composition of many organizations caution their members about the ethical disadvantages characteristic in doing so (Bass & Quimby, 2006). Consequently, counselors working with couples are probable, or perhaps even inevitable, to find themselves assay with the issue and conflicts of one persons right to privacy versus a partner or spouses right to obtain access to knowledge relevant to their personal well-being (Bass & Quimby, 2006). Furthermore, there are additional concerns whe n the disclosures are related to illegal activities. According to Bass and Quimby (2006), an example of potential conflicts is when adultery has occurred in a relationship. Adultery is considered a crime in some states and as a result of keeping this information confidential, it is possible that a counselor could be accused or even aerated with conspiracy or alienation ofaffection (Bass & Quimby, 2006). Researchers further state, that although this charge is highly unlikely, some writers have argued that counselors must not condone illegal act by keeping secrets. Ignorance of the law is not excusable therefore when move in such practice, counselors should be familiar with their state laws and ethical standards (Bass & Quimby, 2006).Couples counselors have a unique relationship with their clients due to being responsible ontogeny multiple therapeutic relationships. As outlined in the American familiarity for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT, 2012) code of ethics, counselors are responsible for ensuring that each counselee has been properly assured and consents to services, while also ensuring confidentiality is discussed and is understood by each participate. AAMFT Codes of Ethics, specifically outlines the expectations of counselors in regards to professionalism among couples, present and past. As well as safe handling of information and communication among counselees as well as third parties. The AAMFT and the American Counseling Association are very similar due to the nature of counseling.scriptural valuesReligion can be a significant character reference of marital and couple conflicts, especially if they do not share the same phantasmal beliefs, however religion also proposes as a man-made lake of resolution among couples with common beliefs (Lambert & Dollahite, 2006). Research reveals that couples that participate in congruent religious practices such as public and private prayer as well as religious attendance, couples were more receptive to co unseling with less negativity and values that focused on having and maintaining a caring, forgiving relationship (Lambert & Dollahite, 2006). Considering that immortals love abridges all of Gods commands, therefore a fitting appraisal of forgiveness is crucial for one to love in a way that pleases God and to help others in counseling situations (Cheong & DiBlasio, 2007). Gods love and forgiveness are inseparably connected all throughout Scripture and often amidst the pain and conflicts of couples is the need for resolution and forgiveness. The inenunciateigence clearly defines marriage, the love shared among those married, as well as the sacredness of matrimony, and although asChristians we cannot impose our thoughts and worldviews, according to the American Counseling Association Code of ethics, it is important that the elements are incorporated in counseling, especially with those who consent to Christian desegregation in sessions.Personal reflectionI personally believe that co uples counseling is important, especially premarital counseling. Although my husband and I dated for six years prior to getting married, we both found that premarital counseling, which is a necessity at our church building, brought forth so many subjects that we had not discussed. The opportunity to learn Gods will for marriage and our expectations of each other, provided clarity that we can reflect to even now. Years into our marriage, counseling would definitely be a consideration if we even found ourselves in need of reconciliation and restoration.Annually, our church hosts sessions during the month of May that focuses on the family. Although this is not considered counseling for us directly, we have found that each year a naked as a jaybird prospective, a new method of communicating, and a renewed relationship results from attendance of the sessions. Reflecting on these marriage building workshops and lessons, reassures me that with the desire to stay focused on Christ, our ma rriage can sustain, and we may even be models for others who are contemplating commitment. I believe that sometimes in the hustle and bustle of life, we can easily slip into routines and repugn to satisfy deadlines, which result in undue stress on relationships. Committing to reconnecting and victorious personal time to show appreciation for each other is ideal and provides the support and recognition that although we may be busy, as a couple we are never too busy for each other. Furthermore, the same goes for our relationship with Christ, it is not enough to just be a claim a relationship, instead works, devotion, praise, and worship are due to Him as a precedence of our lives.While researching couples counseling the most interesting aspect that I notice was the Hope Focused Approach (HFA). The methodology presented in HFA sparked an interest in the first place because of the numerous step-by-step interventions that allow the counselor to be the facilitator, yet offering coupl es the opportunity and supports to reconnect. The opportunity to be aconduit, a vessel, of restoration offers not only the couples hope, it also seems that it would provide counselors with the opportunity to see the magnificent personnel of Christ and his ability to make people, relationships, homes, families, and even churches whole. Christ offers to make all things new, it is up to us to follow him, forward.Incorporating the ethical expectations of a counseling professional presents as challenging. It is evident that when working with a couple, the amount of intervention, developing a relationship and rapport with both individuals, however remaining unbiased, and serving them as a couple seems initially difficult. However, it would be my privilege to be a vessel of Christ to assist couples to complete both premarital and soldierlike counseling, as marriage is ordained by God, however staying rooted and grounded in the Word and maintaining the standards as outlined by the AAMFT a nd ACA subjects one to continued studying, devotion, and increasing competence as well as wisdom to address each couple genuinely.ConclusionAccording to Atkins et al. (2005), there have been numerous disarrange clinical rivulets that confirms the effectiveness of couple therapy as well as the increase in relationship satisfaction after attending therapy. The research further outlines that although there are a number of options, methods, intervention, and treatments greater change in marital satisfaction is expressed among couples who attend direct approach therapy together (Atkins, et al., 2005). Despite these promising findings, there still remains a spacious number of couples that are not responsive to treatment and no correlations have been demonstrated that distinguish between those couples who respond to treatment and those who do not (Atkins et al., 2009). Further evaluations of couples therapy is required to guide treatment revisions that will make techniques more powerful and applicable to increase efficacy among couples according to Atkins et al (2009).ReferencesAmerican Association of Christian Counselors, AACC Law & Ethics Committee. (2004). AACC Code of ethics The Y2004 closing code. Retrieved from http//www.aacc.net/about-us/code-ofethics/American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, AAMFT Ethics Committee. (2012). AAMFT Code of ethics. Retrieved from http//www.aamft.org/imis15/content/legal_ethics/code_of_ethics.aspx Atkins, D.C, Berns, S.B., George, W. H., Doss, B.G, Gattis, K., Christensen, A. 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